Leontine Young has quoted, “The smaller the person, the less we worry about his dignity… Children have a great sense of their own dignity. They couldn’t define what it is but they know when it has been violated.”
This quote speaks tons about what a child feels when he has been bullied or violated. We, as adults, tend to forget how tender their heart is, how vulnerable children are to our behavior with them. A simple passing remark may have a lasting impression on a child’s mind and may batter his personality.
We tend to be very careless when we talk to children. What we need to understand is that we should respect their sentiments the same was as we respect those of adults. The fact that they don’t react does not mean that they don’t feel the same pain or a sense of being laughed at. A child who is growing up is basically moulding it’s personality. How would you feel if your feelings were not given a due consideration? Wouldn’t you feel violated? It is the same with children. Our behavior with them is a stamp on their future. A careless comment on things which are not in his control is a very depressing thing for a kid in his puberty. A child needs to develop his personality, confidence, self-respect. A child who is deprived of the healthy environment struggles everyday. Everyday is a battle. Everyday is a war against destiny.
It is alright to tell a child when he is wrong or when he does something bad. But to laugh at him or to bully him for reasons which are out of his control can actually hurt him beyond repair. A kid who loses his self-respect and confidence takes a long time to rise again. He falls, only to find himself more depressed. He learns to deal with it as time passes. Time is the only cure. But his self-respect? That has been shattered years ago. He keeps struggling, going into a shell. He fights, he rises and he still finds himself falling. It is not a good position to be in. A place where he loses confidence and self-respect. When he cannot respect himself, he cannot rise.
Yes, as he matures, he does understand that the things which he faced in his childhood were not even worth the pain he went through, mentally. But in childhood, he was never mature enough to understand that the cause of his distress was indeed a trivial one and that he never needed to spoil his childhood thinking about such things.
When we deal with children, I think, we should always show them their positive sides and teach them when they are wrong. But the things which are not in his control need not be laughed at.
For me, there is no better sight than a smiling child, at peace with himself. Don’t let anything destroy that peace within. A ‘laugh’ for you may be a ‘cry’ for him.
Rugved Mekta MBA(ITBM) SCIT 2013-2015